C F
I was once a human scarecrow upon a cherry farm
G7 C
On a tower with a shotgun didn't mean to do no harm
C F G7
How that cow got in the air eludes me to this day
G7 F G CG
So many things I would have done but cows got in the way
C F G C
I was a teenage folksinger with a wretched poetry coat
C F G C
It was tie-dye bleached and contained the lousy stuff I wrote
Em Am Em G
With poems inscribed in the lining I'd often bare my soul
G7 F G7 Am F G C
O is it any wonder — my early work was shot full of holes
I was once a world-class clown doing stand-up in canoes
Now my days of building castles in quicksand all are through
Being forced to play ice hockey I was quite a lousy skater
But did some ground breaking "work" as a jackhammer operator
I was a teenage folksinger with a wretched poetry coat…
I sat atop an upright grand beating chords out with my feet
My version of "Cold Turkey" could be heard way down the street
At school the glee club's sponsor — she said I sang "off key"
In numerous humorous doomsday ditties all devoid of glee
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